Reflections & Transitions

It has been a tough transition for Ben from summer fun to school work. Last week, when the bus arrived at our house, there were no excited hands and feet jumping about. The lift carried a confused boy, wondering what happened to those carefree days of swimming, movie watching and lots and lots of time with the brothers.

On the first day of school, Ben came home with brother withdrawal. He could not get enough of them after school, attacking them with his rough hugs any chance he got.

Assuming that Ben would be exhausted from a day of school and therapy, I was excited for some early nights to bed. Wronger I could not have been; he stayed up between 11pm and 1am each evening. I did not count on this transition, but with Ben's increased awareness, I should have. Anyone going from an easy summer of fun to a rigorous schedule of school and therapy would find the change a challenge.

Last day at the pool.

Last days of summer freedom.

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Parenting an Adult Child with Disabilities

"Parenting an Adult Child with Disabilities" is a series on eSpeciallyBen. As Ben approached 18, it was clear our role changed as parents. We needed to help Ben transition into adulthood. These stories are meant to assist other families who face, or will face, some of the same challenges. Talking About the Future Guest Post - Matt Wilson Legal Guardianship, Medicaid and SSI Researching Group Homes Questions to Ask at a Group Home Visit Referral Packet for Group Homes Getting Assistance from a Care Manager From Group Home Placement to Discharge Reaching for Independence

Parenting an Adult Child with Disabilities: From Group Home Placement to Discharge

Last August, we moved Ben into an alternative family living (AFL) placement, about 90 minutes from our home in Charlotte. It was a three-bedroom house and Ben was given the largest bedroom with its own bathroom. A typical AFL in North Carolina operates like this: a person with disabilities, the client, moves in with another family, couple or an individual. The client lives in the family’s home and the family receives payment in return for housing, feeding and caring for the client. Ben’s AFL was unusual: A couple with extensive caregiving experience wanted to run a three-bed group home but needed to apply for the license through the state. They were willing to take Ben as the first resident in a house, separate from the one they lived in. The plan, according to the couple, was to get approval for the group home within a couple of months. We ordered Ben a double bed, headboard, 54-inch television, new sheets, towels and blankets. Friends helped us move him in....

Ben is thriving in his group home in Charlotte. I wrote about what he's been up to in this story in Southpark Magazine: Givers: All together Happy Holidays! Photo Credit Grant Baldwin Photography

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