Something New, Something Blue, Something Borrowed

We have talked potty talk a lot on this blog - from toilet training woes to Medicaid paperwork nightmares. It looks like we may have some relief by next week. Okay, I will stop. But it is making me laugh.

Long story short, we have been borrowing a Rifton Blue Wave Toilet for Ben from the NC Assistive Technology Program since last November. They have been more than flexible with letting us keep the toilet over our allotted time. Last week, I received an email asking us to return the toilet. I knew that all my favors had been called in, my husband had done his diplomatic best and it was time to bring it back.

On the exact same day, Ben's new OT, told us that one of the families she works for has a brand new Blue Wave Toilet in their garage, unused. They got it for their son, but it was not what they needed.

Hopefully by the time you read this, Ben will have his very own toilet. Thank goodness for the kindness of others to provide for the small comforts in life.

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How I Make Being a Mom and Volunteer Work at this Group Home

In September, Ben celebrated three years living in a group home in Charlotte, North Carolina, with five other men. Ben lives 20 minutes from our house, and we see him several times a week for doctor's appointments, to drop off supplies, for group home events and sometimes because I just miss him. Ben occassionally sleeps over, and he often spends a weekend day hanging out on his favorite couch, watching videos at our house. This Easterseals PORT Health home is Ben's second placement. The first placement through another agency didn't work out, and he left after six months . We were wary of trying a new place, but it's worked out well. My husband, Ryan, and I have developed a partnership with ESPH. Over time, we've built mutual respect and trust with the residents and staff. Here's what's worked for us: 1. Get involved with the group home. Ben lives with five other men in a six-bedroom house in Charlotte. On move-in day, Steven, one of the residents, made ...

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Last August, we moved Ben into an alternative family living (AFL) placement, about 90 minutes from our home in Charlotte. It was a three-bedroom house and Ben was given the largest bedroom with its own bathroom. A typical AFL in North Carolina operates like this: a person with disabilities, the client, moves in with another family, couple or an individual. The client lives in the family’s home and the family receives payment in return for housing, feeding and caring for the client. Ben’s AFL was unusual: A couple with extensive caregiving experience wanted to run a three-bed group home but needed to apply for the license through the state. They were willing to take Ben as the first resident in a house, separate from the one they lived in. The plan, according to the couple, was to get approval for the group home within a couple of months. We ordered Ben a double bed, headboard, 54-inch television, new sheets, towels and blankets. Friends helped us move him in....

eSpecially Ben

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